Not from motherhood. From her Smartphone.
According to this article, a significant number of Smartphone users visit Facebook almost fourteen times a day. Surely my social media use isn’t accurately reflected in this statistic. Is it?
If I want a good barometer of my own behavior, I only need to spend a few minutes observing my children. Not only their actions, but their tone of voice paints a clear and sometimes painful picture of what’s going on in our home.
The clamoring begins as soon as the car rolls to a stop. Backpacks flung in the hallway, shoes discarded by the coffee table.
In 2. 5 seconds, they are on the couch with their noses pressed to a screen. The next hour will be a near-constant tug of war: negotiations for more time beyond their thirty minute allotment and incessant requests to buy more apps, because what we have is never enough. Much whining ensues when I reign them in to turn off the devices and start their homework. Irritability skyrockets until the tension is almost palpable. I’m sure we’re a joy to come home to.
So what’s a mama to do? Several prominent mommy bloggers have much to say on the subject…
- There’s this post telling me that I’m missing an entire childhood with my excessive screen time. Thanks. Because I needed more guilt. I don’t believe an all or nothing approach is sustainable long-term.
- In sharp contrast, a recent post on a friend’s Facebook wall highlighted a blog emphasizing that moms’ screen time was fully justified because we spend countless hours watching ballerinas twirl, boys leap and babies achieve milestones. What we lack is stimulating adult conversation and positive feedback. In short, we don’t get out much and therefore our screen time serves as our socialization. To some degree this is a fair argument but based on my own behavior and that of other moms I’ve observed, I say we are, ahem, “well-socialized”. Possibly at the expense of our children.
- This post resonated with me, primarily because Tsh advocates modifying the behavior of the whole family on a consistent basis. A regular screen Sabbath makes sense and is doable.
- Lastly, I found this post from Oh Amanda last night about her authentic struggle with establishing boundaries around the use of her Smartphone. She asks,
“Am I the only one who gets bogged down by this black hole of minimally fulfilling entertainment?”
I cringed when I read that. Because here’s the thing: my kids don’t care if I’m crafting a novel or downloading a recipe for dinner. What they see is me fully engaged with an electronic device and not interacting with them.
So here’s where you weigh in. Where do you fall on the spectrum? Is your Smartphone like an appendage or do you have boundaries in place to limit your screen time when your children are around?
I would love for you to join this conversation by leaving a comment here or on Facebook.
